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Bacolod City, Philippines Wednesday, March 11, 2015

‘I suspect my son is being bullied’

Dear Tita,

My son Monching is twelve years old and is studying in one of the private schools here. Monching has always been a happy boy ever since he was a toddler and everybody loves him. He is so sweet and full of laughter and cariño that his grandparents always ask him to visit them. The minute he sits down for breakfast he wears a happy smile all day until he comes home from school.

Which is why we noticed a sudden change in his demeanor a few months ago. He was no longer happy-go-lucky. He became quiet and sullen. When we asked him why, he wouldn’t answer and goes straight to his room. One time I happen to open his school bag and tried to wipe it clean. I found that his notebooks were full of ugly drawings and bad words. I asked him why he wrote those words and he said he didn’t write them. Also, when he comes home, his uniform is full of dirty smudges and often he has bloodied knees. We tried to find out why but he refuses to tell us.

I went to talk to his teacher as his grades had gone down drastically. She was also puzzled why Monching changed so much. My husband and I suspect he is being bullied in school. But when we asked him about this, he wouldn’t admit to being bullied. What should we do?


Dear Concerned Mother,

There are a lot of cases of bullying that haven’t been discovered until it is too late. Some kids go through this experience with psychological problems later in life. Some kids don’t tell the truth about being bullied as they feel that they are violating an unwritten law if they tell. This belief in “cosa nostra” is one reason why they keep it a secret.

Try to talk to your son’s friends or classmates to find out who are the ones bullying him. The school has an obligation to stop this as soon as possible. Keep on investigating until the truth comes out. As a last resort, consider transferring Monching to another school.




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