My girlfriend’s son
is a spoiled brat

Dear Tita,

The first time I met Chit, I was immediately attracted to her. It was love at first sight! I decided to court her even though my friends told me she was an unwed mother. It made no difference to me. All I knew was that this was the woman I loved. When she agreed to be my girlfriend, I was so happy. I couldn’t believe that this beautiful and intelligent woman could also be in love with me. We spent our days getting to know about each other.

The more I knew, the more I loved her. Chit told me about her past. She was only 18 years old when she got pregnant by her boyfriend, her college sweetheart. The guy who was also eighteen at the time, got cold feet and abandoned her.

Her widowed mother stood by her and helped her through her pregnancy until she gave birth to a baby boy. Despite all the difficulty, Chit managed to finish her studies and find work while her mother took care of her son Joey, who is now four years old.

The first time I met Joey was when Chit invited me to their house for dinner. I was eager to get along with the boy and to have him like me. But while Chit and I were talking in the sala, Joey started pulling his mother away from me. When she said no, he began crying and screaming for attention. His grandma came and took him to his room but he kept on crying and yelling for his mother so I decided to leave. This kept happening each time I would visit their home. We tried to take him out with us to the mall but when Joey noticed his mother giving me her attention, he would have a tantrum until Chit took him home. I could feel how the boy disliked me and manipulated his mother with his spoiled ways. Chit was helpless against her son’s wiles as it was obvious how they spoiled the boy.

I love Chit and want to marry her but how can I solve this problem with her son? I know he is young and possessive about his mother and I would like to win him over. My parents have warned me about the difficulties I will have to face. I am so confused. Any suggestions?

BOTHERED BF

Dear Bothered BF,

This is a difficult situation you are involved in. It would take a special kind of love for you to handle Joey’s resentment and selfishness. The fact that he is spoiled rotten makes the problem more complicated. Chit and her mother shouldn’t have let Joey get away with his bad behavior and now the boy thinks he can manipulate his mother anytime he wants to. What you need is tremendous patience and understanding. You and Chit have to talk about how to handle her son. She has to realize that if she doesn’t discipline him now, there will be bigger problems with him in the future.

Do you have the stamina and determination to make this work? If you do, then I would say, go for it. But if you find that you can not handle this difficulty, then you have to think things over very carefully before making your decision.

TITA                                                                                                   

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