Title

Tell Your Tita

Should I tell her husband?

Dear Tita,

My husband and I are very good friends with Al and Chita (not their real names), a couple we have known for a long time. Al has been instrumental in helping my husband land a job with a good company while Chita has been my rock all these years. She has stood by me through good times and bad and has been part of our family.

Last year I noticed Chita looking troubled for sometime. She confided to me that she and Al were having marital problems as he, who has been so busy with their business that he hardly has time for his family. She told me she felt taken for granted and neglected by her husband. One day Chita told me that she met Eric, a new department head at her office who just transferred here from Manila. I could see that she was attracted to him as he was giving her a lot of attention. The day came when she confessed to me that they were having an affair! I was shocked. I tried to talk her out of it, reminding her how lucky she was to have everything – a good husband, two wonderful kids and a beautiful home. But she said she was not happy with Al and she wanted to leave him. I tried my best to convince her to reconsider but to no avail - her mind was made up.

Last week Al called me and asked me if I knew about their problems. I pretended not to know anything. He pleaded with me to help him find out what was wrong as he was completely in the dark. He said he didn’t want to break up his family as he loved Chita very much. I advised him to give her more time and attention as she might be feeling neglected. He promised he would. But his efforts didn’t work as Chita told me it was too late: she was determined to leave him and bring her kids to Manila where she planned to live with Eric. Poor Al is still unaware of what’s going on. He keeps calling me, begging for my help. My husband told me to tell Al the truth but I refuse to betray my friend Chita, who trusts me completely.

BEST FRIEND

Dear Best Friend,

You are in a very difficult position. You know your friend Chita is making a big mistake but you can’t stop her from doing what she wants to do. She is old enough to make her own decisions in her life. All you can do is try to make her see how wrong she is in giving up her marriage for a guy she hardly knows. The problem is she thinks she is in love with the guy and we all know that feelings will always be stronger than logic. If your husband wants Al to know the truth then he should be the one to tell him what is going on. That way, you won’t betray your friend’s trust. Please try to do everything you can to stop Chita from doing something she might regret for the rest of her life.

TITA

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