‘I’m a visitor here. Please help me’

Dear Tita,

I’m a first time visitor to your lovely city. I hope you can give me some advice on what I should do. When I arrived here last month, I met Cris, a young attractive Filipina whose charm and beauty captivated me instantly. It was a case of “love at first sight”, if there is such a thing. She showed me the sights and helped me a lot by being my interpreter. We got to know each other pretty well and I knew I was smitten. Being an up-front kind of guy, I made my feelings known to her. Cris told me she was attracted to me too, and assured me that age didn’t matter to her when I brought up the question of the wide gap in our age (she’s in her twenties and I’m fifty-two). She did seem mature and savvy for her age.

After a few days, she confided to me about her family problems. She told me that her parents were poor and couldn’t afford to let her finish her college course. They were six siblings – two girls and four boys. She said her father was very ill and needed medical attention which they could not afford. I felt so sorry for her and offered to help with her father’s medical expenses. She was so happy at my offer and accepted gladly. Soon her request for financial help became a regular thing and I found myself giving her money constantly. I even took Cris and her siblings to the malls and treated them to expensive shopping sprees. Of course her cousins decided to come along too. With all the expenses I incurred, I found myself short of cash and had to call my sister to send me money.

I decided to cut down on my spending. That’s when I began to notice a big change in Cris’ attitude towards me. She was no longer the sweet and caring woman I thought she was – she became demanding and would nag me about being “kuripot” (I know the meaning of this word). Even her brothers keep pestering me for money which I know they just spend on their bad habits. They borrowed my expensive camera and laptop plus a lot of my other things.

However, when I asked them to return my things, they still haven’t done so. I complained about this to Cris but she just shrugs her shoulders helplessly. I began to have doubts about Cris and her family. My doubts were further bolstered when I met her father – a tough-looking, seedy guy who didn’t seem sick at all. The first time I met her parents, they immediately began complaining about how their house needed major repairs. I gathered they expect me to shoulder the costs. The thing is, they all think I’m loaded when, in truth, I’m just an ordinary guy on a budget. I have tried to make this clear to Cris but she doesn’t believe me. She thinks I’m holding out on her. She gets cross with me when I don’t give her the money she asks for.

I don’t have anyone here I could trust to talk to about my problem. Could you please advise me what to do?

A VISITING TOURIST

Dear Visiting Tourist,

Run!

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