He's jealous of my husband

Dear Tita,

My husband Val decided to work abroad to be able to give our two sons a good education. We knew we couldn't afford to do that even if both of us were working. After he left, we missed him terribly but we knew it had to be done. At first, Val kept in constant touch with us and sent us money regularly. But after a year, I noticed a change – he hardly called and the money stopped coming. Soon there was no communication from him at all. I tried to make inquiries but to no avail. Finally, I learned from a friend of his that Val had met a woman abroad, and that they were living together. I couldn't believe it. One day I got a letter from him telling me that it was over between us and that he was so sorry for everything. He promised to send money for the kids and wished me luck. It was a heartbreaking letter and I cried for days. This went on for months until I decided to get over it and move on.

I worked so hard and was able to get a promotion and a big raise. Life got better and I began to enjoy going out with my friends. I met a guy named Joey, who showered me with so much attention and care that I fell for him immediately. He kept telling me how much he loved me and we both decided to live together with my sons. We were very happy together and I planned to file a petition for annulment so we could get married. But somehow, I never got to do it.

After a couple of years, Val came back. He called me up and told me he had broken off with his live-in partner and decided to come home. I told him about my situation and he said he was happy for me. When I got home, I told Joey and the kids about Val and the boys were excited to see their father again. Joey was strangely quiet and when we were alone, he said he didn't like the idea of Val being around. For the past weeks, Val has been in constant touch with me and our boys. We have remained good friends and I enjoy talking to him. But Joey resents it and this has been the cause of our constant spats. What should I do?

CONFUSED

Dear Confused,

Since we do not have divorce in the Philippines and you haven't had your marriage annulled, technically, you and Val are still legally married. I think it's about time you petition for annulment and when it is granted, you can marry Joey if you are so inclined. He is feeling insecure because of the situation. Once you are married, hopefully, he will get over his insecurity. I admire you for not holding a grudge against your ex. To remain good friends with someone who broke your heart is certainly a rare and wonderful thing. You must be such a kind and forgiving woman. You deserve all the happiness you can get.

TITA

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