‘Our daughter is pregnant'

Dear Tita,

My youngest daughter Noemi has always been the pet of the family. She is a Daddy's girl and has been a bit spoiled by all of us. When she graduated from college, she applied for a job in one of the big companies in Makati and was immediately accepted. She was so happy telling us of her good fortune. My husband didn't approve of her going to Makati to work, as she had never been so far away from us. He told her to try to find a job here in Bacolod . Noemi was so adamant on going and she pleaded with me to convince her father to let her go. I kept telling my husband to allow our daughter to spread her wings until finally, he reluctantly agreed. Noemi told us she was going to be fine as she was going to board with her best friend's family.

After she left, the house was lonely for she was the life of the party. She would always make us laugh with her jokes and her silly pranks. I could see my husband missed her so much. He worried about her and I kept reassuring him that she would be alright. I told him not to worry a lot as it was bad for his hypertension. Every time I had a chance, I would go to visit Noemi and was glad to see how well she was doing. Months passed and I noticed that Noemi sounded a bit strange whenever we would call her, but I dismissed it as stress from work. Last month, I again went to visit her. This time I was taken aback when she broke down and cried as soon as I walked in her room. Tearfully, she told me that she was pregnant! I was shocked. I asked her how this could happen and she told me she had a boyfriend, a junior executive in one of the companies in Makati . They were so much in love that they forgot themselves and now she was pregnant. I told her that they could get married and that would solve her problem, but she said they couldn't because he was a married man with three kids! I felt my whole world crumble down when I heard this.

I am now back here in Bacolod . I haven't told my husband about this as I am concerned that he might get a stroke. His blood pressure has been up lately and the doctor told him to watch his diet and to avoid stress. My husband would surely blame me for pressuring him to let her go. What do I do now?

WORRIED MOTHER

Dear Worried Mother,

It is so unfortunate that your darling daughter fell in love with the wrong man and worse, she is pregnant with his child! But these things do happen and what you need to do now is to remain calm and figure a way to solve the problem. First, how to tell your husband. Be sure you have his medicines ready and tell him what happened. For sure he will react badly but you have to make him understand that he has to remain calm for his own sake. Ranting and raving won't help. Then you have to discuss your daughter's situation. If she resigns from her job, will you bring her here to deliver her baby? Or will she give birth in Makati ? You have to remember that she needs you both now, more than ever. This experience will be so traumatic that you have to be there for her.

TITA

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