The virtue of self-acceptance
(Last in a Series)

But the whole point is this: the woman does not take issue with Jesus. She accepts the meaning of the proverb, and says, "Yes, Lord, but even the dogs eat the crumbs that fall from the Master's table." Translation: "Yes, Lord, dogs are what we are; but we can avail ourselves of God's smallest mercy, can't we?" Of course the end of the story tells us that the woman's daughter is healed by Jesus.

The whole point of this story is that our self-acceptance of our miserable state leads to divine forgiveness. Many cases are recorded in the New Testament of this truth. It does not mean resignation to our sinful or straying self. It does not mean an abject surrender to our proneness to human failing.

You may have heard the old story of the woman who sat before a painter for her portrait. She said to the painter: "Please, sir, do me justice by this painting." The painter, wishing to be truthful, said: "Madam, the way you look right now, you need something more than justice, you need mercy."

That too is a parable of human life.

If God were to apply his justice on us, we would be of all beings most miserable. "Who shall deliver me from God's justice whereby I would be condemned by my sin?" asks St. Paul. The answer is: "Thanks be to God who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ."

Even if we have been members of our Church for some length of time, I am sure the question is raised by all of us: What if, after we've done our best to comply with God's demands, we are still burdened by our limitations, dissatisfied with the quality of our performance?

The New Testament assures all of us: We can indeed accept ourselves; we can be freed from the neurosis of guilt; we can be imperfect beings but beautiful in God's sight.

God will accept us in our penitence and in our acceptance of what we are for as the heaven is high above the earth, so high is God's loving-kindness for us. What did the repentant prodigal receive when he reached home? A fatted calf to celebrate his turning around; a ring on his finger to signify he's still a son; a robe of righteousness to put aright his wrong, for 'though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool" (Isaiah 1: 18).

I have just read a very absorbing book by the Jewish rabbi, Harold S. Kushner, "How Good Do We Have To Be?"

He concludes the book with these words:

There is a wholeness about the person who has come to terms with his limitations, who knows who he is and what he can and cannot do, the person who has been brave enough to let go of his unrealistic dreams and not feel like a failure for doing so. There is a wholeness about the man or woman who has learned that he or she is strong enough to go through a tragedy and survive, the person who can lose someone through death, through divorce, through estrangement, and still feel like a complete person and not just part of a broken couple. At that point, nothing can scare you. You have been through the worst and come through it whole. When we have lost part of ourselves and can continue rolling through life and appreciating it, we will have achieved a wholeness that others can only aspire to.*

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